REVIEW: Our Slice on Pie
November 12, 2020
With Thanksgiving right around the corner, Crier staffers review and rank a variety of pies from Jewel-Osco from best to worst
#1 Pumpkin pie
A staple to the Thanksgiving time, the pumpkin pie won by a long shot. The pie blew our minds and we could not think of anything wrong.
We knew putting pumpkin pie as number one would be slightly controversial considering other peoples’ takes on it, but with the pies we bought, this was the most fitting place.
The pie to crust ratio was perfect. The filling was not too sweet, but not tasteless. It was a perfect equilibrium of tastes. Along with the taste, the texture was great. The texture of the crust was not too dry and the filling was smooth. It was just an all around good pie.
This was the only pie that was eaten entirely by the end of the review. This pie might be a basic choice, but nevertheless it is most definitely the most consistent.
#2 Sweet potato pie
We bought the sweet potato pie to add a unique pie to this list. None of us have ever had a sweet potato pie, so we were all reluctant to try it. We were pleasantly surprised. According to Anthony, the first bite was a moment of pure bliss.
The sweet potato pie had a strong fall taste upon initial tasting. The aftertaste was the only reason why the pie was placed in second place; it was a little weird and had a hint of nutmeg.
Other than that, everything was close to perfect. We feel that this pie should be popularized more, because it is severely underrated. If you want to have a pie other than the classic pumpkin pie, this sweet potato pie should definitely be your first choice — it will definitely turn heads at the dinner table.
#3 Dutch apple pie
The Dutch apple pie is a modified version of the classic apple pie that everyone knows and loves. This pie was nothing special, it was merely okay. Nothing really made us go “wow.”
The apple filling was pretty bland, but not awful. According to Madi, it tasted like the apple crisp the school used to serve.
The main problem with this pie was the hard crust. Dutch apple pie generally has a hard upper crust, but this crust was a little too hard. The hard crust resulted in the filling going everywhere when we tried cutting a piece off for a bite. This made it annoying and almost a task to eat. The most neutral pie on this list, the Dutch Apple pie sits comfortably in 3rd place.
#4 Key-lime pie
In last place is the key-lime pie — a classic summer pie. This key-lime pie was a big let down. Maybe only because it was store bought, but no one particularly enjoyed it.
The crust was not bad, but from the crust upwards, it was quite disgusting. The lime filling was way too artificial for our taste. Along with tasting extremely artificial, the filling was also tart to the point where it was hard to eat. After you get past the lime filling, 70 percent of the pie was this whipped topping which had the consistency of packing peanuts. It was like eating shaving cream.
All of these factors combined made it hard to even finish a slice. A pie whose best part is the crust deserves nothing more than last place.